Updated: May 12, 2022
I don't think its new to anyone that the quarantine has been... difficult ;) We have been inundated with advice, scary news, every changing rules and policies and a completely new "normal". Anxiety is high, jobs are a luxury, and our homes have become offices/schools/gyms/bars (lets be honest, the bar seems to opens a little early sometimes)
One thing that I believe needs to be talked about more: disordered eating, body dysmorphia, and mental health during all of this.
I have a long history with all three. Much too many of my teen and adult years were spent focused on how my body looked. I was obsessed. And I spent many years battling pretty severe eating disorders. Its pretty incredible to know how little I was and how big I THOUGHT I was. I'm not proud of these years, in fact, most of the time when I think about it, I feel really sad and ashamed. A lot of therapy and counseling taught me to love myself and to get my confidence back, take my control back. And it was a LOT of work.
When faced with my brand new business being forced to close, my kids school closing, ending a serious relationship, and not being able to see my friends and family.... I panicked. I love being busy, I love my career, and I love to be social. I do not love to have no control over my life and frankly, I have felt very overwhelmed and isolated. I have struggled hard with a sense of loss, guilt, and loneliness. My anxiety has been higher than I have ever felt in my life. And I have felt my brain trying to go back to its old ways. The daily fight with myself lately feels like a losing battle... but then I remember that I have so much going for me in the future. So many amazing people in my life that I want to be inspired be and to inspire in return.
I am not telling you this for you to feel sorry for me. I just want to share that we are all going through a lot. And I hope you know that if you have or are dealing with any sort of mental health, eating disorders, or body dysmorphia... I see you. And I am here for you. I hope that we can all take a little time to reach out to each other in times of darkness and feel a little more light and hope.
This article helped me not feel so alone. I hope I can do the same for you. Please reach out to me any time you need support and love :)